Tough times ahead

[JustAnAltIGuess]

Firstly I'd like to explain that I'm using an alt account to post this, I feel it would be difficult for me to post this on my main account. I trust staff enough to not give out my real forum name and to understand why I've used an alt account.

Recently I've been in and out of hospital with mental health concerns, It all started I guess a few years back when I was forced to move away from my 2 month old child and my partner at the time.
Since then it feels like life just keep throwing crappy hands at me, Depression was the first punch which hit very hard, It's not like I haven't experienced it before but this was something else. A sense of nothing but darkness and doom.
More recently I've been noticing some strange feelings and emotions, nothing that I've ever experienced before, a voice, yea sounds crazy right? The thing is, it isn't what you see in the movies, no shouting, no arguments but small whispers, a constant feeling of something running along my skin. To be honest I think I'm scared of the future, It's not like I haven't seen this in movies and those A&E shows, What will this become? will it get worse? Will it get to the point where I may just end it all because it's it becomes too much to handle? I already want it to stop. I literally can't remember the last time I ate either.
I'm working on some mir related projects at the moment and I really am concerned it may be some of the last I work on.

Doctors and local community based help is backed up 2-4 years. I'm worried I wont make it till then.

I just don't know what to do

 

[MentaL]

Women are cruel, life is cruel, and we as people are subjected to its fortunes and misfortunes. I've had some lows, very low. What I've found in my experience is a total occupation of the mind - this is where my bodybuilding obsession comes into play. While your self-prognosis of 2/4 years doesn't sound optimistic, every day we wake up is a day in which we thrive and hope for a better tomorrow. The body is very reactive to stimuli, in your case, depression and stress. When the voices turn ugly, we should be concerned. Do you consume any drugs? Alcohol, cannabis, pills?


Nobody asked to be born into the world. I wish you well, OP.

 

[JustAnAltIGuess]

Women are cruel, life is cruel, and we as people are subjected to its fortunes and misfortunes. I've had some lows, very low. What I've found in my experience is a total occupation of the mind - this is where my bodybuilding obsession comes into play. While your self-prognosis of 2/4 years doesn't sound optimistic, every day we wake up is a day in which we thrive and hope for a better tomorrow. The body is very reactive to stimuli, in your case, depression and stress. When the voices turn ugly, we should be concerned. Do you consume any drugs? Alcohol, cannabis, pills?


Nobody asked to be born into the world. I wish you well, OP.

No drugs, no alcohol. Not for years.
Thank you for your advice and knowledge.

 

[Skyline]

The first thing is to talk.
On here, to mates, family, who ever.

I've had my struggles recently and my doctors are amazing. I go and see my doctor every 4 weeks after work. We just chat, talk about how I'm doing, how I'm feeling and make plans for the next 4 weeks.

Plans of the things I enjoy such as
Go out for drinks with mates
Go fishing
Play football
Go to the football
Take some time just me and the wife. get a babysitter and go out for a nice meal

I'm not sure if all doctors offer this, but she's amazing. It only happened because I finally asked for some help from them. So I guess people are right when they say the first step is admitting you're struggling and seeking advice/help.

Stay strong, make a plan and something to focus on.

 

[Omnibus]

Sorry to hear about your situation.

I hope you find the light at the end of the tunnel.

Don't bottle up your feelings. Reach out if you need to talk.

 

[Whoops777]

If your thinking of things try staying in a quiet place for relaxing room this should relieve all your stress

 

[Slipmatt]

Firstly I'd like to explain that I'm using an alt account to post this, I feel it would be difficult for me to post this on my main account. I trust staff enough to not give out my real forum name and to understand why I've used an alt account.

Recently I've been in and out of hospital with mental health concerns, It all started I guess a few years back when I was forced to move away from my 2 month old child and my partner at the time.
Since then it feels like life just keep throwing crappy hands at me, Depression was the first punch which hit very hard, It's not like I haven't experienced it before but this was something else. A sense of nothing but darkness and doom.
More recently I've been noticing some strange feelings and emotions, nothing that I've ever experienced before, a voice, yea sounds crazy right? The thing is, it isn't what you see in the movies, no shouting, no arguments but small whispers, a constant feeling of something running along my skin. To be honest I think I'm scared of the future, It's not like I haven't seen this in movies and those A&E shows, What will this become? will it get worse? Will it get to the point where I may just end it all because it's it becomes too much to handle? I already want it to stop. I literally can't remember the last time I ate either.
I'm working on some mir related projects at the moment and I really am concerned it may be some of the last I work on.

Doctors and local community based help is backed up 2-4 years. I'm worried I wont make it till then.

I just don't know what to do

First of all, I want to commend you for opening up. It's never easy to open up, much more for men due to its stigma (which we need to break), and for that I pass no judgment for wanting to stay anonymous.

I want to start by just letting you know that though my advice may not be on a health professional level, I am a Mental Health First Aider trained by MHFA England, and so is of my training and experience in the field.

Lets start by acknowledging that Mental Health is NORMAL, and everyone at some point in their life time will experience it in many different forms and levels. Men, more than anyone, tend to suppress these feelings more leading to worsening of the condition. I repeat, MH is NORMAL and is not something you should feel judged about because YOU matter.

Opening up is a great way of releasing some of those pent up feelings, and there is a lot of help outside of the NHS you can utilise to try move forward (I will supply some links for great support at the end of this reply). Please remember that a lot of the help and support available are non-judgmental services and are there to support you and help put a plan in place that works best for you.

Please acknowledge that seeking for help is not a weakness, it is in fact strength knowing that you are willing to work on yourself to get better and be a stronger and more acceptable version of you.

R.E the voices, I just want to stress the importance of mentioning this to both your GP, but any services you engage in for support as this could point toward early stages of Psychosis, BPD, or severe depression. Please, please do not allow this to spiral.

A lot of people find hobbies or activities to indulge themselves in to help manage their MH, which is great, and does work for some people, however, it can also just temporarily suppress these feelings. If you do take up a hobby to manage, don't forget to still seek professional help in the mean time.

Let me get this across straight too, accepting help such as tablets (Sertraline, Mirtazapine etc) is NOT a weakness and doesn't make you a zombie as many suggest. Everyone reacts to the medicine differently and can take time to get into your system and start working. This is not a permanent solution but it can help you whilst you are waiting to be seen by Psychotherapy, Therapy, Counselling, or Psychological therapy.

I do recommend looking into Cognitive Behavioral Therapy if you can, this could be classes, videos, or reading. It really can help.

I want to wish you all of the best, and I want you to know you are NOT ALONE. Please do feel free to message me if you ever need advice, I am an open book and I will not judge an individual.

Links:
https://andysmanclub.co.uk/
https://www.mind.org.uk/
https://giveusashout.org/
https://www.rethink.org/
https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/
https://www.samaritans.org/
https://www.manup.how/
https://no-more.co.uk/mens-mental-health/

 

[MentaL]

No drugs, no alcohol. Not for years.
Thank you for your advice and knowledge.

I've sent you a message via PM.

 

[StormHero]

Firstly I'd like to explain that I'm using an alt account to post this, I feel it would be difficult for me to post this on my main account. I trust staff enough to not give out my real forum name and to understand why I've used an alt account.

Recently I've been in and out of hospital with mental health concerns, It all started I guess a few years back when I was forced to move away from my 2 month old child and my partner at the time.
Since then it feels like life just keep throwing crappy hands at me, Depression was the first punch which hit very hard, It's not like I haven't experienced it before but this was something else. A sense of nothing but darkness and doom.
More recently I've been noticing some strange feelings and emotions, nothing that I've ever experienced before, a voice, yea sounds crazy right? The thing is, it isn't what you see in the movies, no shouting, no arguments but small whispers, a constant feeling of something running along my skin. To be honest I think I'm scared of the future, It's not like I haven't seen this in movies and those A&E shows, What will this become? will it get worse? Will it get to the point where I may just end it all because it's it becomes too much to handle? I already want it to stop. I literally can't remember the last time I ate either.
I'm working on some mir related projects at the moment and I really am concerned it may be some of the last I work on.

Doctors and local community based help is backed up 2-4 years. I'm worried I wont make it till then.

I just don't know what to do

First thing to work towards is not hiding behind different names/others, try putting yourself out there and don't be afraid of asking for help by your true self. Once you have done that, listen and take on board the advice that is given to you and have open conversations on how your feeling each day. Don't run, just 1 step infront of the other and you will make it out the other side and look back on your journey, which then you can help someone else that has been in your situation. Here if you ever need a chat.

P.s. Ban him! Breaking lomcn rules, tut tut.

 

[zedina]

Hello OP

Be strong!

I been dealing recently with the loss of someone dear to me, before that, I had anxiety which didnt really helps me healing through, loosing food apettite, smoking heavily, distancing myself from others. I can feel your pain.

Try to look in for a new hobby, usually something new we didn't do before always capture our interest and makes us forget about current situation, its a start although it doesn't take long till we remember again... repeat...

 

[PoPcOrN]

Firstly I'd like to recommend you go back to.your doctors and make sure you're on the right medication. I don't usually advise this unless it's needed but it sounds it is.

Unfortunately the NHS mental health teams are backed up as you say and it's likely best you go private if you can afford it?

Lastly, I'd really like to make the point that depression can be broken out of and its not a cage... its simply a product of your environment and the people around you. Change your environment and people where need be. Get a new job? Study for a new qualification, get a new hobby, focus on your mir server, start hiking, get outside and do stuff you enjoy.

Make a plan for short term but also make a plan for the long term! Better your life, get out there and apply yourself. Get back on the horse and get that willy sticky

 

[Wond]

Try cocaine and prostitutes

Nah srs pick up something outside of your Mir based projects that you can focus on. Physical activity in paticular, as it forces you to focus on healthy eating habits, cutting back on any other bad habits such as drinking, smoking etc. I lift 3 nights per week and train BJJ 2-3 times per week. These are both things that not only just make you feel good from actually doing, but you also see progression, which in turn promotes the feel good factor. Also as gamer I can almost guarantee you'll love BJJ.

 

[Fusion]

Exercise is so good for your mental health, I would suggest find a club for a sport you like. what ever it is latch onto it. You will meet new people and have fun at the same time.

try something that you think you would not be able to do. You will surprise yourself. Set goals

Be careful sitting in doing projects on PC This can mask it for short periods.

Remember you are loved by friends and family sometimes it's hard to notice but reach out people will want to help you

 

[Tai]

Great replies from everyone... I would echo what people have said about excercise and hobbies. Find something to work towards, goals, a reason to live and get up in the morning.

My other piece of advice would be: if you want or need something, pay for it. Life's too short to be waiting around on NHS waiting lists. What's more important (and therefore worth spending money on) than your health? Take control of whatever your situation is.

 

[forspinki]

Not sure what your money situation is like but It may be worth you going on a bit of a holiday to somewhere full of kind and humble people with positive vibes like Thailand but away from the main city.

Your situation is very different to mine since it's more mental health based but I understand what its like to be scared when you think you wont be around much longer. I was diagnosed with a very serious form of sleep apnoea and my doctor told me if there are no improvements theres a good chance I'll be in within 12 months. surgery is one option I'm pushing for but it costs the NHS like 35k so they don't like to offer it out. If I could afford it and felt well enough I would definitely take my own advice though as I used to travel a lot and being around humble people that are barely scraping by but would still offer you food on the table changes your perspective on life.

I hope you manage to get through it bud.

 

[jaffar99]

Great replies from everyone... I would echo what people have said about excercise and hobbies. Find something to work towards, goals, a reason to live and get up in the morning.

My other piece of advice would be: if you want or need something, pay for it. Life's too short to be waiting around on NHS waiting lists. What's more important (and therefore worth spending money on) than your health? Take control of whatever your situation is.

I'm still trying to work out how skyline manages to see a doctor every 4 weeks, mustn't be in the UK

 

[Skyline]

I'm still trying to work out how skyline manages to see a doctor every 4 weeks, mustn't be in the UK

The same Doctor see's my wife every week!
She has cancer but their weekly catchups are more just for a chit chat than anything medical.

I think I'm just lucky to have such an amazing surgery. The same Doctor will literally respond to all our requests (We use AskMyGP, online form) fairly quickly.

 

[PoPcOrN]

Be careful sitting in doing projects on PC This can mask it for short periods.

I agree with this, it's a good temporary bubble to take you away from everything else but in a way it's also a way to make it worse as it enables it all in a sly way. I found this out the hard way.

 

[Whoops777]

I had the same problem and did 20 years in and out of e.g ward 18 general hospital tho it got re built into a mental health hospital with up-to-date scenery I still take 300mg a nite medication

I was hearing voices and not able to act the way I did before I am 36 next week

The best way is to listen and no the truth and do the exact opposite in life find yourself with your real old mates that do prefer things then drugs also don't take drugs for at least many years

Find a new life to yourself and you will find out your living your life again and things WILL turn around on itself

Be patient mate you do have mates and a life and everyone will see this

Before you no you will be mentally stable I just hope yours is less then mine

I can live a full flourished life and I am at my peek mate

Stay tough stay strong

Remember you mite need to leave computers
If this is dependent and depressing

I hope for the best mate

 

[Whoops777]

Also remember if you find yourself going to prison or working out get a complete schedule chart and don't dedeat yourself take things easy
Infact Try love your life and forget the rest and you will win mate